Why I'm Going to Hell

Another List that I keep on a regular basis to supplement my Crisis List is one I call Reasons Why I'm Going To Hell List.  It's quite a long list and I'm deliberately, willfully leaving off some very good reasons why I'm going to hell.  If I don't the List gets overwhelming in its length, detail, and complexity, and I slack off on my updates.

Willie and I tell each other: "You're not going to hell but wherever you end up there's going to be some bad dudes there."

Anyway, today's reason falls in the general category of "I'm Never Happy With ANYTHING!"  While that's not technically true I sure have a tendency to ferret out the dark, rotting underside of any person, place, or thing.  I can see a defect at a 1000 yards, at night, in a driving rainstorm, right after someone has tossed a beaker of battery acid in my eyes.

"Ow," I say, wiping acid off my mug.  "Hey, is that a minor inconvenience possibly awaiting me over that next mountain pass in another 1000 yards or so?"

I roll into my temporary apartment and immediately start complaining about the things that I don't like or the things that I forgot to bring.  

Part of this, I believe, is normal human nature.  I believe this, I believe, because I do it and I'm uncomfortable when I do it so if I pretend like everyone else does it then I don't feel quite so insane.  I know that when I'm in the midst of something new I try to wait for a bit.  A lot of times I just go to bed and get up the next day - when I'm tired I really can focus in on the crap.

I can see clearly now the something is something . . .