Morning People

Pessimism:  The tendency to expect misfortune or the worst outcome in any circumstances; practice of looking on the the dark side of things.
Optimism: The tendency to take the most hopeful view of matters or to expect the best outcome in any circumstances; practice of looking on the bright side of things.
Practice: Repeated mental or physical action for the purpose of learning or acquiring proficiency.


I used to think some people were optimists and some were pessimists.  Guess which one I thought I was?  I hated optimists; I thought they were the scourge of the earth, worse than murderers and fornicators and people who like Duke basketball, with their cheery smiles and encouraging words.  I couldn't stand being around them, especially when I was in a bad mood , usually when I was sober or not drunk enough.


"What's the matter with you?" I wanted to say.  "It's seven o'clock in the morning."


Today I believe those beliefs were a convenient bit of crap that I fed myself daily so that I didn't feel quite so abnormal.  I worked hard at being negative.  It takes a lot of energy and mental acuity to find the worst in any circumstance.  The definition suggests that I was practicing this worldview, that I was working hard to be negative.


That being said I do believe that some of us tend toward the Dark Side.  The deal is that I don't nourish it like a tender flower trying to push up through the cold soil.  I see the bad; I push the thought out to the best of my ability; I feel better.


Not always quickly but eventually.