Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Horseface -- Superhero!

In my role as Horseface Steve, I exhibit two distinct personalities. My favorite identity is Meeting Horseface. He's a great guy. He says funny things and has profound insights on very serious matters. He listens well. He cares about people, or at least he pretends to. He manages to conceal the fact that he doesn't like anyone and that the world is a great big pain in the ass under a thick veneer of sympathetic caring. While all of his irritability and seething resentments lurk just under the surface, he keeps a smile on his face and a song in his heart. At least he's trying.

Meeting Horseface waves goodbye to all of his friends, wishes everyone a happy and sober week, and walks to his car, where he becomes, in a flash of smoke and light, Real World Horseface. This fellow is a little more problematic. He doesn't attempt to filter his contempt for life and all of mankind. He treats the world like a violent video game. He wants what he wants when he wants it, which is now. Nobody thinks he's funny. They think he's annoying and arrogant.

They're both me, these Horsefaces. They're locked in a Struggle of Death.

Come on, Meeting Horseface!

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