Is there anything more amazing in the life of an alcoholic than the effect of that first drink? I remember more about that moment in time than anything else that has ever happened to me. There I was -- locked in a slow downward spiral of nagging fear and free floating anxiety, and I placed some alcohol into my system. It was like taking a punch to the gut. All of the fear whooshed out of my body with an audible sigh. The heavens opened, the sun shone down, angels sang, and the world was instantly a better place. I could feel that alcohol coarse through my veins like some kind of hot radioactive dye.
The world that I had been living in -- the one that made absolutely no sense to me -- sparkled with a crystal clarity. This is not a normal reaction to alcohol. People who don't have a drinking problem don't know what I'm talking about. Go ahead - ask one. They will tell you that alcohol relaxes them after a hard day or that it helps them feel a little more comfortable in a social situation. Alcohol for me was a burst of adrenaline. It launched me into outer space. I was at the wheel of a Ferrari, at full acceleration. It was a Happy Pill. It was a Very Happy Pill.
You know what I'm talking about, don't you?
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