Feedback

I had a nice chat yesterday with an Earth Person who has known me for - I hate to say it - 45 years.  The subject was my father, a man he's qualified to critique.  I am terrifically blessed with a spouse that listens when I need to talk; I am similarly blessed with a lot of men in The Program who do the same; and I have this great writing outlet which makes me look at stuff logically and dispassionately.  That being said it was a relief to be able to bounce my behavior off yet another sympathetic ear.  I got helpful, thoughtful feedback but mostly the benefit is hearing myself talk out loud because I usually do what I want to do whatever the advice.  But from time to time all of us need to be able to say: "This is what I'm doing," hoping for a positive response but willing to learn from a negative one.

His dad - a longtime member of The Fellowship - died not long ago.  I wanted to hear how his dad felt about dying.  It has been a trip watching people close to me pass away, some peacefully, a few kicking and screaming, others inhabiting spaces all levels in between.  I think that the jist of it was that his father was prepared globally, spiritually, strategically to die but that the end snuck up on him a little too quickly, that he wanted to stick around for just a bit longer, to say some final goodbyes.  I felt really good about that.  I expected nothing less from him.

And here I am juggling my dad's decline.  I don't know.  I just don't know.