Irony

Irony: A statement that, when taken in context, may actually mean something different from, or the opposite of, what is written literally. 

My old sponsor is chairing a meeting here in town and he asked SuperK to lead the meeting.  I was introducing myself to a few of the people at the meeting because I was the new guy at the meeting.  This one dude, unbidden, said he hadn't been at the meeting in a while because he had been in Lao.  Frankly, I could give a shit where he had been.  I hate people who start conversations by talking about themselves.  I wasn't two sentences into my interaction with this guy but I was already bored.  But You People have taught me to be polite, to bite my tongue, to swallow my bile, so I inquired, politely, where is Lao, exactly?  I did not know that apparently, maybe, people in Southeast Asia drop the ess sound when pronouncing the name of the country Laos.  I've never heard it pronounced any other way. 

This man says: "It's a country.  The one right next to this one."

I am not making this up.

I paused briefly and went through the drill.  What I want to say.  What I deserve to say.  What I will say.  To this pompous ass.

"Um, I haven't ever heard it pronounced without the ess," I said, mildly.

Frankly, I was ticked off as the meeting started.  The format is for the chairperson to read a few paragraphs from the Big Book and then to expound briefly.  My dear wife read the section on Resentments.  As in: The Number One offender.  Killed more people than just about any other character defect.  We must absolutely, positively be rid of them.  Or they may kill us.

I am not making this up, either.