Doing the Best We Can

From Step Nine, at various points: "It does not lighten our burden when we recklessly make the crosses of others heavier."  And then, earlier: "We must be sure to remember that we cannot buy our own peace of mind at the expense of others."  And down the road a bit: "The only exceptions (to making amends) we will make will be cases where our disclosure would cause actual harm."

Hey, alcoholics, we don't pay attention!  So our Founders have to repeat themselves over and over!  And they don't even bother to change up the words that much because they know we won't remember what we didn't pay attention to, anyhow!

The Cherokee Lady: "To live peacefully with other people, we need insight and careful judgment.  So much is hidden from ordinary view that it takes time to know something well enough  to say anything at all."

Hey, this alcoholic can't keep his mouth shut!  The advice I dispense often but not often enough that I remember to apply it to my own life regularly is that everyone is doing the best they can with the tools they have at their disposal.  When I tell this to myself and actually believe it then I have a lot of empathy for the behavior of other people.  We're all doing the best we can.  I don't believe there are too many really crappy people out there.  I believe there are a lot of decent people who are making a shit-ton of mistakes.  How about we give each other a big, monstrous break?

Or in Cherokee speak: "Sometimes wisdom is knowing what to overlook.  Because we never know when we are going to be in another person's shoes.  If it should happen we want to be forgiven - for a variety of reasons.  Overlooking shortcomings is not just wisdom - it's kindness as well.  Who has not hoped the world was looking the other way when  he or she fell short of being admirable?"

Maybe the asshole in front of you driving too slowly or driving too quickly or not using their turn signals or speeding up right when the light turns yellow so they make it through but you don't is making a mistake or is distracted by some serious matter affecting their lives.  How about that?