DUI Guy

I got an out-of-the-blue text message from a guy who attended the Keep It Complicated meeting for a while and then less frequently and then . . . . and then . . . and then . . .  Nice guy, got along with him very well, was never convinced he was very serious about his recovery, a periodic drunk which can be a little baffling for us daily maintenance drinkers.  The Big Book talks about a category of people who "want to want to get sober."  I'm careful with this class.  They can waste my time.  They usually waste my time.  I try to be helpful but let's at least pretend some enthusiasm, show up at meetings from time to time, etc. etc.  I've spent too much time waiting for people who intend to keep a commitment but don't follow through on their committement.     I made a loose plan to meet him at today's meeting, dangling the possibility of coffee afterwards.  This way if the dude in question is a no-show I'm doing something I want/need to do.   He did show up . . . . eventually . .  . . ten minutes late, looking unsettled and unkempt, pissed at the world.

Afterwards I listened to him fulminate about his bad luck and bad circumstances for ten minutes, self-pity oozing out of every pore of his body, before calling an audible on the coffee, punting the invitation to two consecutive days at the end of the week.  I have about ten minutes of bitching patience for someone who is a few days sober.  I have about four minutes of bitching patience for someone who is unhappy about being punished for doing something illegal while they're drunk.  I'm at my heart a kind person so I didn't toss out the example made of me when I pitched a bitch about getting a speeding ticket when I was . . . you know . . . speeding.  "How fast where you going and what was the speed limit? which were the only two salient facts about the incident.  Personally, I think we need to issue more DUI tickets and we need to make the fines and penalties worse than they are now.  It's bad enough not caring enough about yourself to stay out of a car when you're drunk but it's positively evil to put other people at risk at the same time.

He looked miffed when I bailed on coffee.  So be it.  I'm fine with that.  This guy asked me several months ago how long I had been sober and said: "Wow.  That's impressive." when I told him.  I always point out that one day at a time applies to everyone, that it's a case of not drinking each day and then the days add up.  There aren't any Bonus Rounds where you get two days for the price of one.  I have to do the same thing every day that the new person has to do.  There's no skipping ahead.  I may have pissed him off.   We'll see.  If that's enough to irk him then he's not evincing much dedication when a lot of dedication is necessary.  Maybe he'll  "show me."  That's fine, too.