Depression

Depression: An emotional condition, either normal or pathological, characterized by discouragement, a feeling of inadequacy, etc.


We alcoholics love to feel sorry for ourselves. We feel like the weight of the world is on our shoulders. Everyone is against us and we can’t catch a break. The ball takes a bad bounce, Lady Luck is not on our side, and Fortune smiles on someone else. The sun is shining elsewhere – it looks like rain here.

Alcoholics are self-absorbed, self-pitying immaturity factories. Most of us have so many blessings that we should be delirious. Most of us live in places where the army isn’t in control, the police can’t kick in your door, and the criminals aren’t ruling the streets. Most of us have enough to eat, clean water to drink, and a dry, warm place to spend the night.

Are we grateful? Not as bloody grateful as we should be. If someone with $105 peels off five twenties and hands them to a alcoholic -- no questions asked, no strings attached, no reasons given – the alcoholic heads to his home group and complains about this guy who cheated him out of five bucks.

We don’t want to feel good. We don’t know how to do it. We are comfortable feeling sorry for ourselves. It is a skill that we have honed sharply over our entire lifetimes. It is familiar and we are loath to give it up.