Thursday, May 6, 2021

Constitutionally Unable

 "Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves.  There are such unfortunates.  They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way."

Constitutionally: In respect to mental or emotional makeup.

This phrase, found in Chapter 5 "How It Works," has always made me a little nervous.  I think sometimes it's an excuse offered by people who aren't doing the work to get and stay sober.  I think most people who don't stay sober aren't doing the work; through stubbornness and willful ignorance.  I don't think there are too many people who are so damaged internally that they can't work The Steps.  I think most people just don't do the work.  It's hard - I get it.  But it's not that hard and it's not as hard as you think and there are countless other folks who have had it worse than you and still managed to do the deal.  So get to work and quit feeding us bullshit.

A few nights ago a friend of mine from A.A. was struck by a car crossing a busy road at night and at an unmarked crosswalk.  His injuries were severe.  He was declared brain dead and died shortly after his family removed him from life support.  He leaves two sons - one in his 20s, one still an infant.  He had drifted away from The Program and back into addiction the last few years.  He was a profoundly damaged man, having spent 15 years in a mental institution when he was a kid.  I don't know whether he had finally had enough and just walked into heavy traffic or if he was high and drunk and didn't know what he was doing or both of those or neither.  I guess it doesn't matter at this point.  He was a gentle soul, much loved in life who will be sorely missed now.

This is constitutionally unable.  This qualifies.


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