Very Bad Things

One of the greatest lessons that I have learned in The Program has been understanding how critical it is to my well-being to move beyond the unpleasantries of life.  First of all, The Program helped me understand that there were going to be unpleasantries, which was a particularly nasty unpleasantry in itself.  Then I had to learn how to deal with stuff I didn't like, and there's a lot of that.  There are the things I don't like that happen to everybody and are unavoidable, like hemorrhoids and bad weather.  There are the things I have brought upon myself.  This is a large list: DUIs and firings and broken relationships.   But the most frustrating things are the unfair things.  Suffering a serious injury or losing a child to illness or a job to downsizing.  Things that weren't caused by my behavior but happen anyhow.

I could never get beyond the anger I felt because something crappy was happening to me.  Today I have been able to reduce the list considerably by starting to behave in a quasi, semi-responsible fashion.  Bad behavior leads to bad outcomes.  The real gains have occurred when I began to address problems like an adult.  Sometimes I can fix problems and sometimes I can't.  There are situations that are beyond my control to repair.  Maybe some counseling can fix the bad marriage and maybe it's time to move on.  I could never figure that out when I was drinking.

Like I can figure it out today.