Linch

Linchpin:  A pin inserted through holes at the end of an axle, so as to secure a wheel; (figuratively) a central cohesive source of stability and security; a person or thing that is critical to a system or organisation.

Linch:  A right-angled projection.  (Ed. Note: I had to look up linch after leading with linchpin.  I fail to see how such a major concept as a linchpin is tied to a vague, almost worthless word like linch.  It hardly seems fair.  I mean think about it: a linchpin holds the wheel on your car to the axle.  I'd hate to have my linchpin fail as I was driving 100MPH).

I've been thinking a lot more about some of my more peripheral relatives in the light cast by the departure of my parents to bigger and better things.  Cousins and their children or their new spouses, shit like that.  I vaguely understood how my folks' relationship with their brothers and sisters and uncles and aunts were the glue holding the family dynamic together but didn't grasp the full power of the connectivity.  These titans were the sun around which we little people orbited.  The fact that so few people stay in a small geographical area doesn't help this cohesion, either - it's not like I can plan a quick barbecue on a holiday and expect folks to cruise on over for a few hours.  They're all hundreds or thousands of miles away.  When I was growing up we were all within a hundred miles of each other, a quick car trip to events nicely coordinated by family-centric adults.

This stuff seems to be held in a common understanding by those of us who have lost our parents.  A buddy in The Fellowship said: "Yea, I understand the business about your father.  Whether good or bad, our fathers occupy a giant part of our psyche.  I found that my dad's departure certainly took a long time to process.  And it didn't seem like I was in charge of that schedule . . ." I also saved a note from a few months ago from the huge and legendary MoMan: "We only get one Dad - imperfect, heroic, frustrating, lovable, and much to be missed."

It a lot to sort out and it's still in the sorting phase.