The Return of The Contractor!

Easygoing:  Calm, relaxed, casual and informal. 

I wonder what the opposite of "easygoing" is?  Hard going?  Easy coming?  Really not easygoing at all?  That would work well for me.

"Wow, that Seaweed is really calm and relaxed."  This is not a statement that will be heard in the near future.  This is a statement prohibited by law.  It's a Class III felony.  Up until the 17th century a person could be stoned to death or thrown into debtor's prison or boiled in oil for uttering such a sentiment.

Too quick I was on The Contractor reprieve.  I get up this morning and draw a glass of drinking water.  It fizzed and foamed like an Alka Seltzer.  I was not happy.  I wanted a glass of drinking water not a fizzy drink that tasted like the salt water mouth wash my mama made for me when I was sick with a sore throat.  I called The Contractor and left a message.

On my way home from the pool I took an incoming call from Willie.  He talked about something or the other - I really can't remember.

"Can I tell you something?"  I asked.  "Do you have a minute?"

"Oh, god, yes," he said.

(Translation, for guys like Willie and me and almost everyone else I've met in The Fellowship: "I am SO tired of living in my head, thinking about myself, blowing little problems up into big problems, would you PLEASE distract me for a minute.)

I started telling him about the fizzy water.  He started laughing.  Check that: he started roaring, a choking, snorting, stop-so-I-can-catch-my-breath laughing.  While I was happy to amuse him - as I knew I would - I was somewhat offended at the level of his mirth.  I was pissed about The Contractor.

He tells me a story involving a computer that took him two hours to solve.  His son - his 8 year old son - walks in and diagnoses the problem immediately, and then starts to abuse him for being so oblivious.

I'm tellin' ya, I got real problems here, people.