One of the main reasons that I don't pick up a drink today is simple fear. I don't think I would make it back in if I go back out. Moreover, I found it hard as hell to get sober the first time. I don't want to go through that again. It wasn't that I couldn't grasp the concept of not drinking but that I didn't want to do the work necessary to stay sober. It's hard work, frequently, and the results aren't always immediately evident to me. It seems that sometimes things got worse, not better.
And it's true for many of us that the simple act of not drinking doesn't solve all of our problems. It solves the headache problem and it sure cuts down on the in-the-backseat-of the-police-car problem and the punched-in-the-nose problem. But some of our problems don't improve right away. Judges and family members and employers don't wipe the slate clean just because we get sober. This wasn't clear to me when i came in. I'm assuming this was because I wasn't listening to people when they were talking to me.
Imagine that.
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