This and That

When I'm not in a good mood it's usually because someone isn't doing what I want them to do.

People here are kind of making me feel bad about leaving, like I'm doing it to them.  I don't, as a general rule, consider anyone but myself when I'm doing anything, so I find this attitude perplexing.  I would rather have folks be happy for my adventure or at least patronize me about being happy for my adventure.  Lie to me, for god's sake.  The lesson for me is to work my ass off at showing interest - at taking an interest - in other people.  Most of the time what other people are doing doesn't affect me so I should keep my own self out of the equation even when I don't like what they're doing.  What business is it of mine to judge what you're doing?  As long as you aren't throwing Molotov cocktails into orphanages why can't I look on the bright side?

Homeless dude was off his meds today - he got frustrated at the pace of the meeting and stormed around the periphery of the room.   The guy talking was boring but still.  Another dude comes in way late and opens up a newspaper.  Controlled chaos.  I enjoy this meeting but I'm going to need some stability before long.  A mix is good.

People do what they want to do.  A lot of us don't pay any attention at all to anyone else.  We do what we want.  It's not just me although as god as my witness I can ignore people with the best of them.  And the people who are really good at being selfish have convinced themselves they're not selfish.  That's quite the party trick - being selfish while telling yourself that you're not.  I can get away with murder when I'm doing that.

There's a guy sitting next to me at the coffee shop whose nose is running.  Instead of getting a napkin and blowing his nose he has chosen to take great big, slurping intakes of air.  The noise is amazing.  I may toss a Molotov cocktail into his vente latte.

Speaking of self-centered . . . my friend Willie got frustrated at a meeting and told some dude off, a dude who sounded like he needed to be told off if Willie is telling the truth which is no sure deal.  He felt bad about it, of course, and approached the man after the meeting to make an amends.  Dude didn't know what he was talking about.  We are thinking about ourselves.  We are not thinking of you.

Unless you is me and I'm doing the thinking.  That's a different matter altogether.