Running From Pain and Problems

"It takes twenty years to become an overnight success."

Unknown Wit

If you study the human body you'll find that many of our nerve endings have receptors that give the brain information on the various threats that we may face: extreme heat or cold: sharp, puncturing wounds; crushing force; damaging sound levels; the slow misery of an infection or disease.  We surely don't get mad at these receptors when they do their job.  "Damn, puncture-sensing receptor - that hurts.  I'd rather stay here and get stabbed repeatedly instead of running away."  These dudes are called nocioreceptors and they fall not all that neatly into the categories of heat and cold; mechanical (pinching, cutting, sharpness); and polymodal (pressure, chemical threats).  How cool is all this?  How glad are we that these things exist?  They're our friends and not our enemies.  No one likes pain but we only stick our hands in a vat of boiling sulphuric acid once, I'll tell you what, we get the message.

One habit I've gotten into - one of the benefits of trying to stay present and in the moment - is taking a close look at my feelings, pleasant or otherwise.  Fear can tell me if I'm doing something stupid and dangerous.  Anxiety can help me prepare for a difficult task.  The problem isn't the hot sulphuric acid - the problem is me sticking my hand into the hot sulfuric acid.  Don't shoot the messenger.  Your body isn't your enemy.  It's not trying to make you suffer for no reason at all - it's trying to keep you safe and alive.  Listen - don't deflect, ignore, or pretend.  That vat of acid really does hurt and trying to spin it in a positive light won't work.

It's the same with fear and anxiety.  When I was anxious after the death of my parents a grief counselor looked me in the eye and said: "What's the anxiety trying to tell you?  There's a message there!"  I was so busy trying to make it go away by ignoring it or attacking it with positive imagery that I didn't learn the lesson that I needed to learn; namely, that loss is hard and it makes you feel bad and that's okay.  Quit running!

"Until now, our lives had been largely devoted to running from pain and problems.  We fled from them as from a plague.  We never wanted to deal with the fact of suffering.  Escape via the bottle was always our solution."

Step 7 P. 74.