People are living their lives here. People aren't stopping what they're doing, dropping everything, and rushing off to accommodate me - they're letting me know when they're available to be seen. This surprised me endlessly when I first started coming back to visit. This time, not so much. As a man who believes that the earth and all the planets and every star in every galaxy is revolving around him, slowly, reverentially, worshipfully, it shouldn't surprise me that I'm surprised that someone else isn't THINKING ABOUT ME! Today I say: good for you, good to see you or I'll see you next time. If I think I'm being dissed then I mess with relationships that mean a lot to me and that is stupid.
I saw as many people as I could. I'm glad I didn't try to see everyone. I spread myself too thin as it is and I had a lot to do. I tend to jump in with both six guns blazing. I tend to mix my metaphors. I tend to say the same things over and over, to repeat myself, to endlessly cover ground that is trampled with the footprints of my jackboots.
Too much time with people for this introvert. Good people, loved people, people that I want to see but people none the less. I get asked about myself too much, something you'd expect from good, nice people but I get tired of talking about myself. It's not all that interesting to be honest about it.
And it's one thing to have coffee or a meal with one or two people, another thing altogether to try to squeeze into the middle of a group that has had regular, intimate contact for the last 4 years. Did not dig this dynamic. Avoided this dynamic.
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