Absolut

Relative:  Not absolute; comparative.
Absolute:  Unconditional; free from restraint or control.

I mull over my all-or-nothing, right-or-wrong, black-and-white personality, my need to fit things completely, unreservedly into neat little categories.  I need to be absolutely sure of everything, absolutely happy, unconditionally certain of the way forward.  It has to be Great!  Wonderful!!  Spectacular!!!  I don't have time for headaches or slogging forward or making do.  I want my thinking process to be like flipping a switch: no doubts and no vagaries.

Yeah, good luck with all that.