If:  Expressing a supposition, condition, or hypothesis; on condition that; in case that; supposing that: as if I come, I'll see him.


It's not about me.


If it's not about me, then who is it about?  You?  I don't think so.  If it's not me then it sure as shit isn't about you.  It isn't about anyone else within a hundred miles of me, either.  It may be about someone a continent over but I even have my doubts about that.


If it's not about me . . . and that's a huge If . . . then it's not about anybody.


In case that it's not me.  I like that turn of a phrase better.  It sounds like the only way it can't be about me is on the condition that something terrible would then happen.  In case of fire, break glass, that sort of thing.  In case we have a nuclear attack, put your head between your knees and kiss your ass goodbye.


Anyway, semantics aside, the point is that I need to spend my day today making sure that everyone else has fun.  It's not to make sure that I have fun because when I do that then I trample all over everyone else's fun and I have very little fun myself.


I tried a new meeting this morning.  It's a pretty big meeting so I didn't get to talk which is to the group's detriment because clearly I'm the smartest, funniest, most insightful and humblest person there and everyone's life would be enriched immeasurably if I spoke, at length.  In the past I'd get a big honking resentment about this but today I know what to do.  I made a beeline for the two guys who indicated that they had under 30 days of sobriety.  That's who I need to talk to because they are so completely not interested in me that it does me a lot of good.