Fun In The Shade

Part of the trouble I have with all of these fun people having so much fun is that it aggravates my expectation machine, suggesting that there are tons of ways that everyone else has fun and that I'm not doing any of them.  I sit at the coffee shop in the sun and drink a cup of coffee and watch people walk by, judging most of them harshly.  I do that a lot or whenever the sun shines.  On cloudy days I sit in the shade.  I also read the paper and write about how horrible it is that life is screwing me so completely.  While I consider these very enjoyable, a pleasant past time, I get the impression that many people consider this non-productive fun, and there's nothing that I've found to be more productive than imagining all the bad things that come to people's minds when they're thinking about me.


I had fun today.  Not a LOT of fun but I had fun.