Solution Based - Problem Based - You Make the Call

 I hadn't planned on attending a meeting today but I woke up early and made the drive.  The meeting was small so I'm glad I made the effort to go.  Moreover, there were a couple of women there that I've known since I arrived in SoCal.  One of them, a flight attendant, recently moved back into the area from Texas, where she had been based, and spent ten days with her ex-husband in a blackout drunk, a continuation of the relapse she suffered in Dallas.  She did not look good.  The other woman, a chronic relapser, was recently released from the hospital where she was undergoing treatment for brain damage she suffered from her renewed drinking.  She looked worse.  I like both of these women.  Between them they've got a few days of sobriety.

The meeting was led by a woman who recently completed her year milestone.  She has a lot of professional responsibility as the executive director of a homeless shelter and is in the midst of a difficult employee situation that she's prevented from talking about due to confidentiality restrictions.  Driving home last night the idle thought crossed her mind that it sure would be relaxing to get home and have one drink; in fact, she used the charged word "cocktail" to sort of class it all up.  While it didn't seem to me that she was actually going to go through with this plan of action she was aware enough to pull off the highway for a short spell to dispel this kind of thinking.  I was struck by the two examples this morning: two problem based, one solution based.  The director looked pretty good this morning.   There was also a young woman there who has a couple of months clean and sober.  A better series of lessons to hear I can not imagine.

I often share the story of my last drink: Easter Sunday in 1987.  I drank and drank and drank and never experienced even a minute of relief, the kind of relief that the director imagined she might have.  The jumping-off point.  The instance where I realized I couldn't imagine a life with alcohol or without alcohol and, folks, that covers all the time there is.  I can remember that day with startling clarity.  It was one of the worst days of my life.

A surprising number of people believe that other people can hurt their feelings.

Acceptance is the only real source of tranquility, serenity, peace.

We can very seldom change people, though we can change ourselves.

We have free will which means we can choose a path of evil or a path of goodness.  Sometimes I wonder why man wasn't just programmed to walk a righteous path but then we'd be robots and what's the fun in that?  If you want a reward then you have to choose to do good.