Came To Believe . . .

 “Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted.  We can look the world in the eye.  We can be alone in perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator.  We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience.” Big Book P. 75.

There is the famous passage in the Book called The Promises; it's so loved that it's read in many meetings as a matter of course. Many of us believe that there are tons of "promises" in the literature. The above passage, which occurs as the alcoholic is completing the Step Five inventory-sharing process, is a great example. I wasn't so taken with the "nearness of our Creator" part - this seemed nebulous and indistinct - but losing my fears and feeling perfect peace and ease? I'm in. I don't think I had a moment of crappy, half-assed peace and ease in my life while I was active. I could blot out my fears but I was never able to put them into a healthy perspective, to use them to grow and change. I cowered or I obliterated.

Decide: To come to a resolution after mental consideration.

Act: To do something.

Early on I had a sponsor - no doubt frustrated with my bitching - say something along the lines of "why don't you go home and scrub down your kitchen walls? Just do something!" Good advice even today if the choice is between action and thinking.

"We ask for spiritual and physical strength to execute his will.  Restoration of our mental and spiritual health is in direct proportion to our recognized need for help and our willingness to work for recovery." Little Red Book P.P. 88-9.

As this is the second month of the year the A.A. Daily Reflections book is focusing on Step Two. Our discussion topic today centered around the eternal struggle between comfort and contrary action. Given the choice I always choose comfort. Fuck contrary action. If I need to take action to address something that I'm uncomfortable with that means I'm uncomfortable with something that I need to take action to correct. I hate growth through adversary. I'd like growth to come while I sleep and through no expenditure of effort on my part.

Work: Activity involving mental or physical effort done in order to achieve a purpose or result.

Effort. Grrrrrrr.

Aphorism of the Day: I'm responsible for my second thought and for my first action.