The Girl From Ipanema

Patient:  Willing to wait if necessary; not losing one's temper while waiting.
Wait:  To delay movement or action until some event or time.  

Boy, I don't like to wait.  I like to go.  I like to get things done.  I like to finish the fuck up.

Do you know those people who are always happy and optimistic?  They have big smiles on their faces and they tell you to have a nice day?  Where do those people get off, anyway?  Who the fuck do they think they are?

My diet is sort of a mess right now, especially in the areas of sugar and caffeine.  My wife gets mad at me when I use the "old" word around her; then she tells me that I've lost my mind when I behave in ways that suggest I still think I'm 12 years old.   I'm drinking too much caffeine (read: any caffeine at all) and I'm eating too much sugar (read: shut the fuck up about the sugar - touch my sugar and you are in a world of hurt).   My body isn't responding very well.  There are many things we can get away with when we're very young and very stupid and some of these things become increasingly problematic the older we get.

I am an addictive person.  I do things to excess that make me feel better through chemistry.  The drugs and alcohol are obvious winners in the Excess Sweepstakes.  I smoked for many years, loving the sense of well-being that nicotine produced in my body.  Sugar and caffeine - please see above - but fat and salt aren't anything to be sneezed at, either.  I have at times used sex and exercise - both lovely things in moderation - so that I can suck on the endorphin rush.

With most of these substances there is the problem of decreasing sensitivity - the more we use the more habituated we become and the more we need - and cumulative effect - the more we use the harder it is on our bodies and the longer it takes to purge the detritus from our bodies.

I don't like the sound of any of this.  :(