Will

Will:  One's independent faculty of choice; the ability to be able to exercise one's choice or intention; the act of choosing to do something. 

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of god as we understand him.

This is one of those steps that I don't try to look at too closely because it would drive me to distraction, leading eventually to a state of insanity yet more severe than afflicts me already.

So my understanding is that I need to give up the ability to make choices for myself, in the Great Scheme of Things.  I don't think the step means that I can't choose between cereal or oatmeal for breakfast, except for those cases where I don't have either and/or oatmeal and it's not breakfast time.  Rather that I should defer to my Higher Power in all things great and small.

The problem is that with every issue in my life I'm driving hard to the hoop.  I've taken the kickoff and I'm sprinting down the sideline and I can taste the dirt in the end zone.  My instincts have something to say about everything.  They're not interested in deferring to someone or something else.

It's not easy to do.   It's not easy at all.  It's not easy to say: "Whatever."  To live my life well to the best of my ability and take what comes with equanimity and good cheer, secure in the knowledge that the results will be in my best interests.

Try it if you don't believe me.  

I want MY results!