Leap Year Dental Work

Leap Year:  A year of 366 days, occurring every fourth year: the additional day, given to February, makes up for the time lost annually when the approximate 365 1/4-day cycle is computed as 365 days.  (Ed. note: talk about lazy?  The most brilliant astrophysicists in the world can't come up with anything better than slopping an extra day on every 4 years?).


So I went to the dentist today, on the last day of February in a Leap Year.  This day may not exist, if you ask me, so I'm a little anxious that the work I had done today is going to vanish in an ephemeral cloud of partially suspended tooth dust.  Fake work on a temporary day, accompanied by real pain.  Actually, I have found in sobriety that properly administered, legally prescribed drugs DO have a real purpose in the world above and beyond my need to get stoned.  The Novocaine worked perfectly and I was as comfortable as I could be while someone was using a drill whirring at extremely high revolutions to grind off a living tooth.


I had a cracked tooth which needed to be replaced by a temporary fake tooth while I wait for the real fake tooth to arrive from the lab.  The 5 year old who pointed out to me a couple of days ago that teeth do not proceed from a state of angry pain to a state of painless health spontaneously was actually helping the dentist today.  He climbed up on a little step stool, peered into my mouth, and said: "Yeah, you have a cracked tooth.  Can I have a red sucker?"


The guy who did the work seemed to know his way around the room which was surprising since he had only been at this for like 35 years or so.  He charged too much, of course, so I'm a little ticked about that.  And he rooted around in other areas of my mouth that were giving me no problems whatsoever and found some other suspect teeth.  I HATE it when they start rooting around in there.  It's like going to your mechanic to get a flat tire fixed and having him open the hood and start looking around.  Of course he's going to find something.


So I'm still in The Problem.  I'm working on the solution, though.  I'm trying not to concentrate on the money and the pain and the rooting around.  I'm glad I can afford this and that I think enough of myself to get my body worked on, not the case when I was drinking.  I'm glad my overall health is good.  I'm happy with the dentist and the job he did.


Several hours later.  I just bit into a piece of apple on the afflicted side.  Ah, I was surprised at how pleasant it was to be pain free.  Now I remember what a pain in the ass it was wincing to steel myself against the pain that was sure to come.


Pain free.