Enough Already!

Enough:    As much or as often as necessary;  to the required degree or amount; adequate.


This is a GREAT word for an alcoholic to ponder.  We use the idea to our advantage most of the time; we take the concept and wield it as a club to beat the world over the head, and we're not shy about bending the meaning to our selfish purpose.


For example, I may say that I don't have enough money or that my wife isn't nice enough or that the car I drive isn't luxurious enough, and my boss sure doesn't show me enough respect.  Then I think about my Program: it's good enough.  I go to enough meetings and make enough phone calls and spend enough time on my prayer and meditation.  


See how that works?  When I want something the meaning of the word seems a little dark and nefarious.  I'm getting Screwed out of something.  I'm not getting my due; not even close, not even in the ballpark.  Enough seems to be a bare minimum, far, far below what I should have.  Think enough oxygen to barely sustain life.  I'd be alive but I probably wouldn't be too comfortable.  Adequate! in other words.  I hate adequate.


Then, in the circumstances where I should be doing some work or giving something back, then enough seems to be kind and generous and perfectly acceptable.  I feel like I've climbed a great mountain and I'm looking down at the valley thousands of feet below: "I'm high enough here," I think.  The word seems to be imply that I've overcome great obstacles to get to enough, not that I'm just a tick over barely adequate.  I've given enough of my time, I've helped enough people, and I've been of enough service.


I'm good at twisting things around.  I can start an argument from a certain point of view and end up defending the exact opposite viewpoint.  This is why people don't like to argue with me.  It's not that I don't fight fair, it's that I'm barely coherent.  It's an argument with an insane person.


It's kind of fun, sometimes, though.