The Conundrum

Compliment:  Something said in admiration or praise.


The only thing that irritates me more than being criticized is trying to figure out what to do with a compliment.  Compliments make me really, really uncomfortable.  In a surprisingly substantial way I enjoy the criticism more than the praise.  I know what to do with the criticism.  I feel shitty about myself anyhow so I secretly believe that the criticism is justified; in fact, I'm just lucky the criticizer doesn't really know all about me.  They're merely scratching the surface; it would be a blood bath if they knew my deep, dark secrets (Ed note: by "deep, dark secrets" I mean "fairly ordinary things that I've blown way out of proportion).  And when someone says something that isn't complimentary I get to fight back, which I love to do, or I get to run away, which I love to do even more.


I've come to believe that this is not only unfair to myself, it's unfair to the person who is trying to be nice.  Today I think the right answer to a compliment should fall along the lines of: "Thank you.  I appreciate that.  What a nice thing to say."  Today I personally enjoy dispensing compliments; it makes me feel good to say something nice to someone else.  It's fairly disappointing when the other person tries to fight off my kind words with excuses or sarcasm, even though I understand the impulse.  As an Egomaniac with an Inferiority Complex I crave your praise at the same time it's making me uncomfortable.


I can take a blow.  I can't take a pat on the back.