New Year's Eve

Ever notice that there aren't a lot of anniversaries between Christmas and New Year's Eve? I can't imagine choosing to quit drinking a few days before December 31st. It was hard enough quitting in August, and there aren't any holidays in August that I'm aware of. Still, it was so hard to quit that I don't even remember the exact day. I made one up.

I was addicted to those times when drinking came out of the shadows and assumed the guise of normal behavior. along with all other times. Acceptable public drunkenness was a good thing for me when I was drinking, given my affinity for public drunkenness. I'm going to assume that most people with an AA anniversary this time of year quit under some duress: police intervention or detox or dire warnings from spouses.

So far this holiday season I have gotten to spend time with my blood brothers and marrow sisters from The Program, and also with my family of origin. Can you guess which has been more enjoyable? I bet you can.

On Christmas Day SuperK and I went to a friend's house for a brunch and a meeting. There were about 20 other people in recovery there. I have done this a number of times and I always leave marveling at the substance of this program, although the food is so good I'd come if it was some kind of time share presentation, followed by a dramatic religious ceremony. The day was what I think the holidays should be about.

My family seems to engage in Massive Expectation whenever gifts or meals are involved. I never feel like I'm doing it right no matter what I do. I get the wrong gift or I don't spend enough money or I spend too much money. There's a heavy air of passive aggressive disapproval.

Ho.