Searching For Loopholes

Practice:  Repetition of an activity to improve skill.
Principle:  Moral rule or aspect.
All:  Everything possible.

I was at a meeting last night - coughing discretely in the back row, especially when someone irritating was sharing, a common occurrence when the person sharing isn't . . . you know . . . me - digging on the great topic of "practicing these principles in all of our affairs."  I like the word "practice" which seems to give me the leeway to screw up continuously while still trying to get better.  I don't like the word "principles" because there's a vile stench of ethical behavior hanging about its nadir like an evil fog.    I really don't like the word "all" which doesn't give me any wiggle room to act jerkishly.

How about "practice some of these principles occasionally, when it's convenient?"

There was also a dude there who took a 6 year coin.  He's very active in The Fellowship, one of those dudes who always just shows up.  I thought the two topics/shares were two peas in a pod.  You know, it's not like I would drink if I missed my regular Wed evening meeting but I want to avoid even the slightest lessening of my vigilance about my Program - if I slack tonight maybe it's a little bit easier to slack tomorrow, until I find myself far down the slippery slope .  I don't mean to suggest that I worry if I miss my recovery obligations when I'm sick or traveling or have some important personal commitment but that I really work on that consistency.  It has worked for me for over 27 years so I'm not going to tinker with the formula.

The segue with the principle-practicing part of the meeting's festivities is that I do shoot for that perfectly ethical, moral target, the one that feels right to me.  There are so many behaviors that have nuance, that allow me to justify less than righteous behavior.  For instance, when I was drinking I gossiped all the time - malicious, character-assassination gossip meant to hurt and injure.  Slowly, slowly, sloooooowly I got to the point where my gossip fell under the category of "suggesting to a third party in the most constructive way how an absent gossipee could improve if they would only %^!! do things differently."  Is this improvement?  Sure.  Is this particularly ethical behavior?  Uh . . . no.  Today I try to never, ever talk about anyone unless I'd be comfortable repeating what I'm saying with that individual right there.  Better, but not a finished product.  I still find that I have to call my sponsor to let loose a torrent of invective about someone who is doing something that really sticks in my craw so I'm not over the belief that I do know how someone else should behave, a laughable concept.