27

Cistern:  In a flush toilet, the container in which the water used for flushing is held.

I realize this is shocking news but I ignored my friend's example about humility and service that should hold true even on a Program anniversary - especially on a Program anniversary - and decided to Take a Cake to celebrate with my brethren and sistern.  The desire to be the center of attention was transcendent, overriding my desire to be humble.

What I forgot was I forgot that Friday is a book study so the attendance goes down by half - if you want to reduce attendance trot out some literature and ask people to read it - and that it was a Tradition study to boot, halving the already decimated attendance even further.  I mean you could hear crickets in the corner of the room.  When people talked there was a distinct echo.  I had just assumed on my anniversary it would be SRO, that my sponsor would have arranged a big screen TV and powerful speaker system so that all the folks who wanted to laud the shit out of me but who couldn't get into the basement would still be able to catch my remarks in kind of a flash mob that would spill into the street, blocking traffic and attracting reporters and law enforcement and paparazzi.  

I was still working on my shtick while Michael was reading How It Works.  I was going to KILL this morning.

I'm not making this up.

I guess I thought I was up for an Academy Award or something.  If I had said everything I had said to myself in my own head before actually coming to the meeting no one would ever get to leave.

I was brief.  This isn't a comedy club.  No one wants to hear me work the room.

Still, I'm proud of 27 years.  There is a certain amount of diligence required to add up that amount of time continuously.  I am proud of the considerable work that I've done.  It takes some time.  The payoff is unimaginable but it still takes due diligenc.