Givers and Takers

 "The world is composed of givers and takers.  The takers eat better but the givers sleep better."

There's a homeless situation in my town - the weather is nice which attracts people, I believe, and housing is really expensive which often tosses even people who are working outside.  I'm often approached and asked for pocket change.  Sometimes I give money but sometimes I don't.  A 40ish dude with a backpack and a guitar approached me as I was filling my car with gas yesterday.  I opened my wallet but only had twenties.  "Man, I could sure use a twenty," he said.  I shrugged my shoulders -whadda ya gonna do? -  reflected, motioned the guy over, told him I'd buy a Pepsi to get some change.  I asked him what his deal was as we walked over to the shop: got a dui which cost him his job, got behind on rent and utilities and alimony, outside he went.  He wasn't bullshitting me. I have an acute bullshit radar.  There's a really nice guy who has been coming to our morning AA meeting for a couple of months who - while waiting for subsidized senior housing - is sleeping outside.  Refuses to go to a homeless shelter, adamant that it's safer to sleep on concrete.  I gave him $20 one day, unbidden.  I saw him the next day  . . . . with a cup of Starbucks.  Haven't seen him since.  He wasn't bullshitting me, either - his odor told me that.  When I walk on the beach I'm frequently hustled on the way down by a guy who's standing outside a liquor store.  "Dude," I said one morning.  "Don't stand right here.  Jesus.  At lease pretend you aren't going to go right in and buy beer."

There are signs in our downtown area telling people to give money to local social services and not to panhandlers.  If everyone passes out money then the homeless will be attracted.  But there are some people who simply will not avail themselves of temporary housing.  Some are obstinate, like my AA friend, and some are too mentally ill or addicted or damaged to take that step.  I often give money.  I often give the occasional outrageous tips to the kids who staff the shops I frequent, and these are outrageous for these kids and not for me.  I feel better, somehow relieved when I do this.  

Willie and I were talking about an oldtimer at his meeting who approached him in the parking lot afterwards and asked for money.  Willie offered to follow him to the local Wal-Mart to just buy the burner phone he needed.  "Bill, I don't have a car," the guy said.  Willie gave him the money.  Willie has no expectations of getting the money back.  We agree that the rule of thumb is that money dispensed is a gift and not a loan.  We often talk about the spiritual principle that the more you hold onto some physical "thing" the more power it has over you, aware that it's easier to give a thing up if you're living in abundance, like we are.

Giver.  At times.  And happier for it.