Fast!

Fast:  Quickly, with great speed; within a short time.

As part of my never-ending fascination with myself I was reminiscing - I really should say re-reminiscing because I never stop pondering my fate in life unless I'm taking some time off to think about my current circumstances or what may happen to me in the future - about my foray into Optometry School.    My aborted, unsuccessful foray into the field of eye doctor-ness.  I made it half way through which really wasn't the point of starting in the first place - I was kind of going for the going-all-the-way technique.  And I didn't leave because I thought this was a good idea - I left right before the door smacked into my ass regions.

If there was an event in my life that could have caused a great deal of regret this would be it.  "I coulda been a contenduh," in other words.  A doctor of the eyes.  Dr. Seaweed - it has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?  I am overjoyed to report that, because of this wonderful Program and its emphasis on moving forward and not looking back, that the regret is nowhere to be found.  Part of this a practical reflection - the field of optometry has changed in ways that would have made the occupation less than optimal for me.  Plus, I really enjoyed the work that I ended up doing although saying "I was a salesman" when people ask me about my occupation doesn't have the same impressive cachet.  Well, what do I care what people think about me anyway?

I guess part of the screed here is that it sure is helpful - especially at the start - to have a job that you enjoy.  Sobriety is hard enough without having to show up every day someplace that you don't want to be.  The flip side of the coin is that even if you think your job sucks - and it probably isn't as sucky as you're making it out to be - having something to occupy your time for a big chunk of the day is a good idea.  Plus, there's that whole needing money to live thing that has to be taken into consideration.  Pretty important, that.

But the whole re-reminiscing part sort of originally centered around the idea of speed.  Fast speed.  Moving fast and purposefully into the future.  Part of my struggles in optometry can be traced to the fact that I was in a much accelerated mode at the time.  While it was not an absolute requirement to have an undergraduate degree many of my classmates had one or had at least completed 3 years of college.  There was a small group of us who doubled up on classes and went to summer school and performed well enough to earn early admission.  

Two things here - it sure made my 2 years of undergraduate work miserable.  One year I had 7 final exams at the end of a term due to all of the lab classes I had to take in conjunction with the regular classroom work.  The other hindrance was that I would occasionally find myself in say, my first microbiology class, with people who had degrees in microbiology.  I was definitely at a disadvantage competition-wise.

Part of this was purely practical.  I was responsible for most of the costs of my education - the considerable costs - and it made sense to get from the money-draining part of my life into the money-making part.  I was not in a position to "find myself" in school.  I was right there.  I knew where I was.  It wasn't the right place, obviously, but I was on the map.

Moving fast into the future.