Crap! Stuff!!

Stuff:  Miscellaneous items; things; personal effects.

On the second night with the sky still a fiery red we decided - even though our house was not in a mandatory evacuation zone - to put together a few piles of things that seemed essential to us, things that could be grabbed in a minute and tossed in the trunk of a car, things that would help us reconstruct some kind of life if everything else was gone.

It was a weird, out-of-body experience.  It was also not as difficult - in a purely practical sense - as you might think.

Dopp Kit: A term particularly in use in America for toiletry bags.  The name derives from the early 20th century leather craftsman Charles Doppelt, whose company designed the case in 1919.

A Dopp Kit with medical essentials - the one medication I take, glasses, contact lenses, very expensive mouth guards.
A small wooden box with passports and credit cards.
Jewelry, watches, rings.
Two big armfuls of manila file folders which contain all kinds of practical financial and legal documents.
A smallish box filled with 28 years worth of photos, videos, travel mementos.

You know - as incredible as it might seem - after that it was kind of "Meh."  When you ponder it you see how ephemeral and transient everything is anyhow.  Most of the financial docs are online and easily duplicated.  Same thing with credit cards and passports.  Jewelry is stuff.  The pictures would seem to be irreplaceable but the truth of the matter is I haven't looked at any of them in 25 years - I'm sure someday I'll look again but - really - is my daily life going to change?  

Health.
Wife.
Family.
Friends.
Pets.  

What else is there after that?  Stuff.

I guess if I had a somewhat controlled evacuation I'd grab a couple of big armfuls of clothes and toss 'em in the trunk.  I walked around, looking at all the other things, reassured.  I don't mean to say it wouldn't be a Class One Trauma to lose all this stuff but it doesn't seem like something that should ruin my brain.  I'm not going to try to collect certain decorations or ornaments to save in a quick run to safety.  

It's funny how this pondering makes me sit up straight and take notice of weirdness.  I swam this morning, came home, and pulled an old T-shirt out to wear, scattering a couple of nicer shirts to get to it.  You know - don't want to wear out something good for a home lay-about.  Seemed ridiculous in light of a possible burning.  I can seem myself saying: "Why didn't I wear that cool T-shirt from China?"  I've enjoyed seeing and touching all my crap the last couple of days - hard to take something for granted that you think you might lose.

I was texting with a friend from The Fellowship this morning, a guy who was in the path of the fury a day or two later than we were.  I asked if his little town was out of danger: "Yeah.  Not too much left to burn," he replied.  He attached some photos of areas that I hike frequently - so frequently that I know every turn and dip and rise: terrain scorched right down to the dirt.  I plan on getting back out there as soon as it's safe - I've made up my mind that it's going to be a different kind of beautiful, and I'm not going to let it bring me down.

This morning was the first time I woke up and felt relatively safe.  Now the winds are blowing big again and have shifted direction so huge plumes of smoke are blowing back over our area.  It's hard to tell if they're old fires or new fires or close or far away.  It's goddam hard to relax.