Quiet! I'm Thinking.

Think: To keep continually in the mind; be obsessed with.

I have been thinking a lot lately about thinking. I'm a great thinker. It's a lot easier thinking about doing something than actually doing something, especially if the required action is at all unpleasant or difficult. So I sit and think. I weigh options. I mull over possibilities. I have long arguments with bitter enemies, confounding them with my brilliant logic. I convince everyone that my point of view is correct. Everyone comes to accept my way of thinking.

I have a wonderful ability of convincing myself that whatever I want to believe is, in fact, true. I am not usually deterred by the facts. Facts are play-doh to someone with my intellect. I can mold the facts to my liking. I can make a square peg fit in a round hole. I have a lot of powerful hammers. I am skilled at pounding. You better believe that those fucking square pegs go where I want them to go.

On the surface I appear to be a run of the mill horse-faced guy with a pleasant, somewhat vacant look on my face. This unremarkable exterior masks a much more sinister interior. The scene inside is nightmarish. It's Charlie and The Chocolate factory on steroids, right after the oompah-loompahs have taken LSD and gotten off of their anti-psychotic medication. It is not for the faint of heart.